HSPs's topics - tribe.net

New Magazine for HSPs! Looking for contributors, too.

denmarkguy — Mon, 12 Oct 2009 01:47:43 GMT

Doesn't seem like a lot of people come to this group anymore-- still, I thought I'd stop by and share something; pretty exciting, all in all:

As you probably know, Elaine Aron published her book "The Highly Sensitive Person" in 1996, and since then hundreds of thousands (if not millions) of people have learned that there is a "name" for these odd feelings we've always had, and that that this "thing" we feel isn't some "illness," but a natural innate biological trait.

Of course, our journeys have taken many different forms-- for most of us there has been much learning, and a sense of relief at knowing that "we are not alone." That has certainly been true for me.

In 1996, there was not much information about High Sensitivity... slowly, a few web sites and forums sprung up; eventually the trait got better known. Now (October 2009) we stand at the doorway of the NEXT stage of HSP awareness-- if you guys are not already aware of this, the inaugural issue of "Tribe" magazine has just been issued.... and no, it doesn't have ANYthing to do with this web site.

"Tribe" is a quarterly magazine FOR HSPs, about HSPs (and HSP issues), created and written BY HSPs. It is not only a magazine, it's also a global online community-- the community creates the content of the magazine. In other words, it offers HSPs everywhere a "voice."

No, I DON'T work for "Tribe" (even if this sounds a bit press-release-ish!), I just think it's a brilliant idea whose time has come-- as one of the "oldies" who has been part of the global online HSP community since 1997... there was NOTHING like this, when I first tried to learn about sensitivity. We've come a LONG way.

SO....

Go check out the site; read the magazine (online version, OR you can buy a paper copy) join the their forum... where YOU get to add your articles, stories, photography, poetry. Add the site (and the forum) to your favorites. If you have a web site and/or blog with "HSP content," why not add a link, and a brief blurb? If you twitter, tweet it. SPREAD THE WORD! Your support helps THEM give YOU a voice, as an HSP... so you're really helping YOURSELF, in the long run.

Tribe home page: http://tribe.paramimedia.com/

Tribe forum: http://tribe.paramimedia.com/community/index.php

Tribe magazine (online/to order a copy): http://tribe.paramimedia.com/print-version-now-on-sale/

Thanks for reading!
~Peter

posted in HSPs - 2 replies

HSPs, What's the Most Fulfilling Job You Ever Had?

Honeylet — Sun, 30 Sep 2007 12:25:07 GMT

Im going back to school soon. Choosing between IT or nursing, which job do u think suits HSPs? Thanks

posted in HSPs - 6 replies

Sensation seeking

Jen — Fri, 09 Jan 2004 01:52:13 GMT

How do you feel about the following questions?

1) Do you love trying new things (if they are not going to be too overwhelming?
2) Are you easily bored?
3) Would you eventually be restless living in a quiet, secluded, regulated life, like living in a monastery or running a lighthouse?
4) Do you usually not want to see a movie twice, even if you enjoyed the first time?
5) Do you enjoy trying new things?

posted in HSPs - 13 replies

2008 East Coast HSP Gathering, October 2-6

denmarkguy — Sat, 09 Aug 2008 00:01:48 GMT

(I tried posting this as an "event" but didn't see it anywhere....)

The next HSP Gathering will take place in Phoenicia, New York, from October 2-6, 2008... and to encourage all who read this to consider going and being a participant.

This is the first Gathering to be held on the East Coast since since the Pennsylvania event in 2005-- offering a opportunity for those who don't live in California an easier venue to meet and spend time with fellow HSPs.

Registration for the East Coast Gathering is now OPEN, and the sooner you sign up the lower the conference fee will be. I know it's in the nature of HSPs to "pause and reflect," but please register as soon as you can, as it will keep your cost lower... eventually, registration may reach an "as available" stage if you wait too long.

I cannot overstate the "value" of going to an HSP Gathering. I say this from the perspective of what I have personally gained from going to six previous Gatherings... as well as from the perspective of watching 100s of HSPs experience major life transformations as a result of attending.

Gatherings are about learning, about going on a retreat, and about fellowship with other HSPs. We spend Thursday through Monday together, engaged in a mixture of workshops, social time, and just "quiet time" to reflect on the ongoing experience.

You might say "yeah, but it's just too expensive!" I'll save the explanation that it's actually a lot LESS than your typical 5-day self-growth workshop-- in fact, you'd spend TWICE the amount it costs to go to a Gathering going to a weekend workshop with Elaine Aron at Esalen, Omega Rhinebeck or Kripalu. I feel fairly confident in saying that it will probably be one of the best ways of helping yourself understand the HSP trait, and in feeling validated as an HSP. There's a good reason why people keep returning to these events, year after year. This will be the 15th Gathering since they began in 2001.

You might say "yeah, but it's a GROUP!" True. It is. But I can also tell you that a group of HSPs is like NO other group you'll ever be part of. The level of emotional safety, validation and inclusion is-- literally-- "mind altering" for people... I have watched the MOST retiring and introverted of HSPs virtually "become extraverts," in a matter of just 48 hours.

You might say "yeah, but I am too much of a misfit, even for a group of HSPs." If you are skeptical, or want to get a better sense of how a Gathering REALLY work, I encourage you to read Gathering attendee Marcia Norris' words on "Why HSPs Need To Gather" or read my own photojournals from a couple of Gatherings I have been to.

http://www.lifeworkshelp.com/hspgatheringretreats/info.htm#note

http://innerreflections.homestead.com/hsp03ca1.html
http://innerreflections.homestead.com/hsp07ca1.html

Again, I can only say that I have personally watched fellow HSPs' perspective change from a sense of "I am doomed to be a misfit" to having made a dozen new friends, in a matter of days. To loosely paraphrase one of my good friends and fellow HSPs, who has attended many Gatherings: "It is amazing to come here and feel more welcome and included by a bunch of strangers than I feel with people who have been my family for over 50 years."

Information about the upcoming Gathering, as well as registration forms-- is now available on organizer Jacquelyn Strickland's web site:

Info: http://www.lifeworkshelp.com/hspgathering.htm

Registration form:

http://www.lifeworkshelp.com/RegistrationEastCoast2008.pdf

Hope to see you there!
--Peter

posted in HSPs - 0 replies

Would you rather be an IT pro or a nurse?

Honeylet — Wed, 03 Oct 2007 23:36:41 GMT

Any IT people, healtcare pro/student in here?

posted in HSPs - 2 replies

Involuntarily hearing your heartbeat/ feeling your pulse

Sat, 29 Sep 2007 10:33:35 GMT

Just wondering if anyone else here experiences the same thing.

For example, i was reading my notes a few days ago, and involuntarily felt the pulsating/ throbbing feeling in my hands. The pulsating feeling doesn't just originate from the wrist, but from all the fingers. i guess this is rather strange, because although the thumb supposedly has its own pulse, the same thing isn't said about the other fingers.

Hmm..i did a quick lookup, and apparently the little finger also has its own pulse. But i didn't find anything for the other fingers. i guess i'll look up more about this later as i'm running short on time now.

This was what Wikipedia had to say:
radial pulse - located on the thumb side of the wrist (radial artery)
ulnar pulse - located on the little finger side of the wrist (ulnar artery)

Anyway, the pulsating feeling will be accompanied by the booming sound ringing in my ears. i suppose you can say that it's like me with a stethoscope.

i normally have to change the position of my hands, or totally not hold whatever it is i'm holding at that time (from what i recall, they usually occur when i'm holding a reading material). Leaving my hands alone, that is allowing them to just be free helps, but even when they're relaxed, it happens, and the feeling can actually be clearer then. And sometimes, they recur. They never really bothered me much so i'll just normally leave it, and it usually goes away after a while.

i wonder the reason for it though. Like why it happens only at certain times.

A long time ago, as usual, i was in the notion that it was a normal thing experienced by everyone.

posted in HSPs - 1 reply

Finally reading Making Work Work...

Jen — Mon, 22 Nov 2004 05:33:34 GMT

So has anyone else read Making Work Work for the Highly Sensitive Person yet? I have gradually been making my way through it and have had yet more "A-ha!" moments. I think there's a lot in there that ties into Peter's previous "underachiever" thread, for example.

posted in HSPs - 5 replies

Colorado HSP Gathering Oct 4-8

denmarkguy — Thu, 02 Aug 2007 03:27:41 GMT

Greetings all!

From time to time, I have written to the group about the "HSP
Gatherings" that now occur on a fairly regular basis, usually two or
three times a year.

I am writing this to share information about the next Gathering,
which will take place in Estes Park, Colorado, from October 4th-8th,
2007... and to encourage all who read this to consider attending a
Gathering. And yes, I am planning to go.

This is the first Gathering to be held in a location off the west and
east coast, offering more ready access for people all over the
country. Also, with Denver being the "mid-country hub" of most US air
travel, this is an attractive location from the perspective of
inexpensive air fare. And if you need a different sort of "excuse,"
Colorado is REALLY beautiful in the fall, when the leaves are
turning.

Registration for the Colorado Gathering is now OPEN, and the sooner
you sign up the lower the conference fee will be. I know it's in the
nature of HSPs to "pause and reflect," but please register as soon as
you can, as it will keep your cost lower... eventually, registration
may reach an "as available" stage if you wait too long. As of this
writing, there are already registrants from as far away as the UK and
British Columbia!

I cannot overstate the "value" of going to an HSP Gathering. I say
this from the perspective of what I have personally gained from going
to many Gatherings... as well as from the perspective of watching
100s of HSPs undergo major life transformations as a result of going.

Gatherings are about learning, about going on a retreat, and about
fellowship with other HSPs. We spend Thursday through Monday
together, engaged in a mixture of workshops, social time, and
just "quiet time" to reflect on the ongoing experience. As with the
majority of past Gatherings, Elaine Aron will be giving the "keynote"
presentation.

You might say "yeah, but it's just too expensive!" I'll save the
explanation that it's actually a lot LESS than your typical 5-day
self-growth workshop-- in fact, you'd spend TWICE the amount it costs
to go to a Gathering going to a weekend workshop with Elaine Aron at
Esalen, Omega or Kripalu. I feel fairly confident in saying that it
will probably be the best money you'll ever spend in helping yourself
understand the HSP trait, and in feeling validated as an HSP. There's
a good reason why people keep returning to these events, year after
year.

You might say "yeah, but it's a GROUP!" True. It is. But I can also
tell you that a group of HSPs is like NO other group you'll ever be
part of. The level of emotional safety and inclusion is-- literally--
"mind altering" for people... I have watched the MOST retiring and
introverted of HSPs virtually "become extraverts," in a matter of 48
hours.

You might say "yeah, but I am too much of a misfit, even for a group
of HSPs." If you are skeptical, or want to get a better sense of how
a Gathering REALLY work, I encourage you to read Gathering attendee
Marcia Norris' words on "Why HSPs Need To Gather" or read my own
photojournal from the first Gathering I went to, in California.

http://www.lifeworkshelp.com/hspgatheringretreats/info.htm#note
http://www.innerreflections.homestead.com/hsp03ca1.html

Again, I can only say that I have personally watched people's
perspective change from a sense of "I am a misfit" to having made a
dozen friends, in a matter of days. To loosely paraphrase one of our
members here, who has attended many Gatherings: "It is amazing to
come here and feel more welcome and included by a bunch of strangers
than I feel with people who have been my family for over 50 years."

Information about the Gathering, as well as registration forms-- is
now available on organizer Jacquelyn Strickland's web site:

Info: http://www.lifeworkshelp.com/hspgathering.htm

Registration:
http://www.lifeworkshelp.com/hspgatheringretreats/RegistrationFormHSPGatheringCO.pdf

Hope to see you there!

--Peter

posted in HSPs - 0 replies

finially i found somewhere i fit!!!!! :)

PENFOLE — Sun, 27 May 2007 10:21:21 GMT

Hi there. thanks for all of your input about HSP. I was surfing the net and came across the site. I read the blogs on the page and it is exactly what i am experencing. I have been called `sensitive` at work. I do not fit into the norm of the workplace. Where people are more interested in gossip than work. It is a nasty atmosphere and unfortunalty i am sensitive when the bad moods appear. It was great to see that a few people were out working on there own. Does anyone have any ideas to deal with pople who are not as sensitve as us?? Thanks for the blogs :)

posted in HSPs - 3 replies

so sensitive, so misunderstood

zeela — Thu, 30 Dec 2004 02:22:57 GMT

I hope I'm not the only one out there who cries so easily. It doesn't take much...a thoughtful commercial, a dead racoon on the side of the road. I feel too different from everyone around me. It's difficult to get along with people. I have a hard time making friends...with people (animals love me as I love them). People seem so thoughtless/uncompassionate at times. I don't have many friends, it gets a little lonely at times. Are there others like me in this tribe or others that can relate?

posted in HSPs - 9 replies

art project on my tribe page needs your comments

bragitta — Mon, 30 Apr 2007 11:16:40 GMT

I am creating an art project on my tribe page
an interactive art project
where I make an piece of art and then post a question of what I have been thinkng about
and the comments inspire the next piece of art and question

comments greatly inspire the projects direction
so please hop on over to my tribe page
and see if this art project will provide anything in your own healing

posted in HSPs - 0 replies

reaction to movies

smoorefu — Wed, 24 Jan 2007 19:07:33 GMT

Does anyone else find that they are super, super sensitive to movies? That is, that movies that leave other people just saying, "that was a good movie" will cause you to jump out of your skin many times, cry your eyes out, etc.?

I went to see Pan's Labyrinth last night with friends. I knew it would be intense and challenging, but it was more so even than I thought it would be. I was prepared for some war and shooting, but I was not at all prepared for point blank shooting of people we had gotten to
know, nor torture scenes and its aftermath.

I managed somehow not to clutch at my friend sitting next to me at all, by hugging/clutching at myself instead. I was quite proud of myself for this, but these friends had never seen me at a movie before and did not get it that this was an accomplishment. We were going to go to coffee afterwards, but the close places were closed, and one of my friends was too tired to want to go elsewhere. But he did, thankfully, do me the favor of staying on the phone with me while I drove home.

It really made me miss seeing movies with my husband (from whom I am now seperated) or my best friend (who I live far from now). They would let me clutch their arm, pet me afterwards, and talk about the movie as much as I wanted.

I never thought of this analogy before, but last night one of my friends asked me if I was ok (guess I looked a bit shell shocked) and that's when I said I needed "movie aftercare".

I was talking to said best friend afterwards and saying I needed a replacement for him to go to the movies with. We were imagining the Craig's List ad:

------------
Highly sensitive person seeks movie companion. Must be willing to have
one's arm clutched at during gory or suspenseful moments. Must be willing
to provide "movie aftercare" by talking about the movie afterwards, in some
detail and with intellectual rigor. Must have no problem with subtitles.
Ability to say "there, there" convincingly a big plus.
------------

Does anyone else know what I am talking about?

Sometimes I wish I were less sensitive, but then I remember that I value that sensitivity in many other ways, and actually love that about myself. I don't know if I could make myself less sensitive to movies while still keeping the sensitivity in other ways.

posted in HSPs - 13 replies

introduction

Ender — Sat, 10 Mar 2007 21:07:29 GMT

Hi, all!

My name is Ender. I thought I'd chime in and let people know that I'll be around.

If you want to know a little about me, I posted a recently written bio on http://everysecondnew.pbwiki.com.

posted in HSPs - 1 reply

Any extroverted HSP's out there?

Raezen — Wed, 10 May 2006 17:59:21 GMT

I usually test as an ENFP on the Myers Briggs, but sometimes I test as an INFP. . . in general when I'm at a party in which I feel comfortable I am a goof-ball drunkard, mingling with everybody . . . but at other times (especially when I'm PMS) I find myself hiding from the world, being very sensitive to bright lights, noise, chaos, traffic and anything too stimulating to my senses.

posted in HSPs - 9 replies

Any London HSP's out there?

elemental — Tue, 28 Nov 2006 00:28:34 GMT

Or am I the only one?

posted in HSPs - 0 replies

77 members, and....?

denmarkguy — Sat, 25 Nov 2006 17:39:12 GMT

I've been away for a while; just checking back in to see what's going on here.

Seems there are plenty of people who belong to this tribe-- wondering if anyone else ever reads these pages? Seems like we HSPs have plenty of issues/challenges in the world that merit discussion, support and answers... yet we seldom share, even with others of our own HSP-ish persuasion. Why is that?

What would anyone who reads these words like to see discussed?

Curious,
Peter

posted in HSPs - 0 replies

newbie here...

kriscarey — Sat, 29 Apr 2006 17:27:21 GMT

OK, I'm new to tribe and not sure how this works... I do know, however, that I am an hsp, and would love to chat with others of the same ilkage. Anyone want to give me the brief overview of tribe?

posted in HSPs - 1 reply

is this tribe still alive?

smoorefu — Fri, 21 Apr 2006 15:44:46 GMT

Greetings,

Is anyone still here? I just noticed that there haven't been any posts in a long time.

I'm trying to think of a new discussion topic, but I'm blanking out here. Maybe something will come to some of you...

posted in HSPs - 10 replies

HSP & the world of Jobs....

alternate-realities — Fri, 08 Jul 2005 19:09:42 GMT

I wanted to ask all of you how do you support yourselves financially and what job situation has worked best for you? Which situations proved to be a challenge?

posted in HSPs - 7 replies

New Tribe for Sensitive, Adventurous Romantics

Tue, 22 Mar 2005 16:43:24 GMT

I have created a new tribe for the shy, introverted, and kinky among us -- without using the words "shy", "introverted", or "kinky". Please check it out!

http://philly.tribe.net/tribe/5f246957-9834-4c3e-97cb-90e15a530ee4?_click_path=Application%5Btribe%5D.Tribe%5B5f246957-9834-4c3e-97cb-90e15a530ee4%5D&r=10319

Membership is moderated for now to keep out known trolls and flamers. Otherwise, please feel welcome to join -- and to add some pictures to the photo album!

Denise

posted in HSPs - 2 replies

newbie intro

Thu, 14 Jul 2005 19:51:48 GMT

hello fellow HSP's
like many of you i'm not only HSP
but an empath
and extremely psychic

has it's pros and cons
but wouldn't change it for the world

looking forward to the discussions
i'm sure i will learn more than i can imagine

blessed be
~dd~

posted in HSPs - 4 replies

Flower Essences

Gi Gi — Sun, 13 Mar 2005 18:38:50 GMT

Has anyone else here used flower essences to help their sensitivities? They work to balance the emotional being without taking away the better aspects of a person.

posted in HSPs - 1 reply

2005 East Coast HSP Gathering

Jen — Sat, 02 Apr 2005 20:32:31 GMT

3rd Annual East Coast HSP Gathering Retreat
April 21 - 25, 2005

Bryn Mawr Mountain Retreat Center
Honesdale, Pennsylvania (2 hours from NYC)
North of the Poconos, West of the Catskills,
In the Upper Delaware River
On 165 acres of lawns, woods and meadows

Click here to read about the breakout descriptions:
http://lifeworkshelp.com/newsletter/bulletin/

Dr. Elaine Aron, (www.hsperson.com) will be our guest speaker on
Sunday, April 24, 2005 speaking on
"The Sensitive Inner Child in All of Us".

posted in HSPs - 0 replies

A Highly Sensitive Burning Man

HeavyG — Sun, 13 Feb 2005 05:06:33 GMT

I read the Highly Sensitive Person and felt like I was reading my life's story. I called it my "bible" for a while. (Later, I realized even HSPs are not all alike!) But I just found this tribe today and I feel like I have come home.

I visited last year's Burning Man, thinking I should have the experience at least once, even though I figured I would probably end up melting down. I ended up loving it. I took earplugs. :) (There's some concern in my mind as to whether being on antidepressants helped, too.) It was spiritual, liberating, scary, delightful, and eye-opening. http://plunk.org/~grantham/public/burningman2004.html

I'm toying with the idea of starting a camp for highly sensitive people. Give out earplugs, a decompression booth, a place for people to just sit and kind of know we are all there but not be particularly stimulating... I have a 12x20 canopy that served me well last year.

Any thoughts?

posted in HSPs - 5 replies

SAD + winter

Tue, 01 Mar 2005 15:03:58 GMT

Hi -

I am wondering if HSPs are more prone to Seasonal Affective Disorder than most. I moved to a more northern latitude and it has been really kicking my butt. I have always been extremely sensitive to changes in light but this has taken the cake. I will not be living here next year for sure. I finally bought myself one of those special lights that keeps people interested in things. I get it in two days. I can't wait.

Cat

posted in HSPs - 2 replies

Are You a Healer or An Empath?

Angel — Thu, 04 Mar 2004 20:31:12 GMT

I have found that most HSP's are meant to be healers, practitioners or to be on a fast growth track. When I finally embraced my healing ability, things got a lot better for me. I had to accept that I noticed everything about everyone, and that this was a gift I could use for the good.

I have to baby myself -- make sure I get enough sleep, limit the outside stimulus, not drink. I had to learn to become nonreactive to people and things, to shelter myself as a sensitive being.

When I work with clients, I can spot a HSP immediately. They are hyper aware of others, and this is actually a gift that can be used in many career paths. It helps people to KNOW this and treat themselves differently than others. The trick is to make allowance for it by learning to shelter themselves, to work on becoming less reactive to others while retaining the gift of being so intuitive and aware of others.

I think we HSP's are special. I'm wondering how many of you are spiritual, are healers or use your sensitivity as the gift that it is? I know that embracing my gift by becoming a healer has turned my life around completely.

posted in HSPs - 6 replies

Coloring as meditation/stress reliever?

Jen — Mon, 29 Nov 2004 23:03:43 GMT

Somehow, I periodically end up on these "one thing leads to another" searches on Amazon and one of my recent interesting discoveries is that there's coloring books out there geared toward adults. It seems to be common for them to contain mandalas or geometric shapes to allow one to create their own patterns and palates. Apparently, some find this very soothing and/or use it as a means of meditation. Does anyone here use coloring as a form of self-care?

posted in HSPs - 0 replies

Do you like writing letters?

denmarkguy — Fri, 24 Sep 2004 13:47:56 GMT

Don't get me wrong-- I love the web, and the way it allows us to connect with people all over the place.

However, the other day I got a postcard from a friend, and it made me realize how warm and almost "organic" it feels to get "real" mail from someone, written with pen and ink-- "physical evidence" in my mailbox. It's not that I don't like email, but sometimes it just seems so "mechanical" and less personal, somehow.

Don't know if anyone else feels that way (sometimes, or often) but for those who share my feelings-- or some version thereof-- I also wanted to give a quick "plug" for friend of mine, who's trying to establish an "HSP Pen Pal group." Yes, it's slightly ironic that she is using the WEB to start a SNAIL MAIL group.... but hey, it has to start SOMEwhere. :-)

Anyway here it is:

http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/hspsnailmail/

--Peter

posted in HSPs - 3 replies

Anybody going?

denmarkguy — Fri, 24 Sep 2004 13:38:34 GMT

I was just wondering if any of the HSP tribe members are going to the HSP Gathering in Three Rivers, next week?

If so, I look forward to meeting you there!

--Peter

posted in HSPs - 0 replies

HSP books, web sites, etc.

denmarkguy — Wed, 08 Sep 2004 18:18:32 GMT

What are some of your favorite books and web sites that are definitely useful/helpful to HSPs?

posted in HSPs - 2 replies

The Quiet American: a site that might appeal to HSPs

Jen — Sat, 11 Sep 2004 01:28:11 GMT

A friend told me about The Quiet American:
http://www.quietamerican.org/index.html

I thought it might appeal to fellow HSPs as there are lots of interesting recordings found here. After all, being HSPs, I think it's safe to say that we would all agree that even in complete "quiet," there are all kinds of interesting ambient sounds out in the world!

posted in HSPs - 0 replies

2004 California HSP Gathering

denmarkguy — Fri, 21 May 2004 21:00:44 GMT

Greetings all! The details for the 2004 Fall HSP Gathering in California are now in:

September 30 - October 4, 2004

St. Anthony's Retreat Center, Three Rivers, California

Keynote presentation by Elaine Aron, PhD:
"Creativity & Sensitivity: A Joyous but Tumultuous Union"

Other presenters include Barrie Jaeger, author of "Making Work Work for the Highly Sensitive Person"

Additional workshops (final schedule TBA) will include:
Coping/Thriving Skills Workshop
Healing Power of Music
Developing Intuition
Work & the HSP: Panel & Small Group Discussion Format
Panel & Small Group discussions/presentations of HSP Subcultures,
HSP Special Interest Groups
Living Simply: An HSP Alternative?

For more information and complete schedule, please visit:

http://tinyurl.com/2vgry

As a past attendee, I HIGHLY recommend this to all of you-- there is nothing quite like spending four days with people who truly "get it."

--Peter

posted in HSPs - 6 replies

Meeting other HSPs

denmarkguy — Fri, 21 May 2004 19:28:37 GMT

I recently went to Elaine Aron's workshop at The Crossings, here in Austin. It was great to be with other HSPs.

One of the things we talked about was precisely the importance of meeting and spending time with other HSPs. There's a sort of "peer counseling" and validation you can get from spending time with someone else who "gets it" that you simply can't get from others.

Anyway, someone pointed out that there is now an "HSP/Elaine Aron" group on meetup.... it looks pretty small and new, but I guess if enough people sign up, it at least gives us a stab at getting to know others in our area. Just thought I'd share that-- I've gone ahead and added my name.... the next "meeting day" scheduled is June 16th.

http://earon.meetup.com

--Peter

posted in HSPs - 3 replies

Special deal at hsperson.com

Jen — Tue, 11 May 2004 00:20:36 GMT

I just received a postcard in the mail today advertising the release of _Making Work Work for the Highly Sensitive Person_ and sharing the news that only at hsperson.com, you can purchase the book with all 30 back issues of *Comfort Zone: The HSP Newsletter* (and a special essay by Dr. Aron, "The History of the HSP Concept") for $100.

posted in HSPs - 0 replies

HSPs & underachievement

denmarkguy — Sat, 17 Apr 2004 13:38:37 GMT

I sometimes wonder is HSPs tend to be underachievers. Not in a "Bart Simpson slacker-who-doesn't-WANT-to-work" sort of way, but in terms of finding their happiness in somewhat esoteric fields that aren't necessarily well regarded, or well compensated. Elaine Aron touches only very briefly on this, in the HSP Workbook, stating that HSPs seem drawn to fields which-- COINCIDENTALLY-- happen to be poorly compensated: Librarians, Artists, Writers, etc. It seems to not be an issue of not wanting to work hard, nor an issue of rejecting the material... but more of a "coincidental underacheivement."

Anybody have ANY feeling for what I'm talking about, here?

--Peter

posted in HSPs - 7 replies

HSP dating

Chris — Mon, 10 May 2004 15:24:59 GMT

After years as a frustrated singleness, I'm seeing somebody -- and he's sweet and smart and geeky and Jewish and just about everything I've been looking for. It's fabulous, but -- I'm just not getting enough sleep when I spend time with him. I always mean to go to bed on time, but we end up cuddling and talking, and there's the distraction of having another body there. So I'm tired all weekend and I get overwhelmed and cranky and I can't really enjoy myself or him. How have you dealt with meeting your own sleep needs in a sexual relationship?

-- Chris

posted in HSPs - 0 replies

Making Work Work for the Highly Sensitive Person by Barrie S, Jaeger

grey-eyes — Wed, 21 Apr 2004 02:35:29 GMT

I stumbled across this at the book store today. I had no idea it had been published. Has anyone read this? If so, any comments/thoughts?

Thanks!

:-)

posted in HSPs - 4 replies

Tips and tricks

Jen — Thu, 22 Jan 2004 02:50:32 GMT

We all know about making sure to have lots of downtime, but what are some other tips and tricks have you developed as an HSP in honoring and taking care of your sensitivity?

I'll start with one that came up in dialogue just this past weekend: ear plugs. While I do use them a lot for going to live music events, I actually developed this practice some years earlier. In my previous job, I would tire out easily from too much people interaction and, during my breaks, I would pop my ear plugs in to create a temporary quiet buffer.

posted in HSPs - 15 replies

Canned excuses

Emmazon — Thu, 19 Feb 2004 05:55:32 GMT

Hi guys.

I feel terrible asking this, because it's really to help me become a better liar...

But sometimes at parties I'm shortsighted enough to go to, I get progressively overwhelmed and then... just flee the scene or babble some insane kind of "Gotta go--now" to the hapless host :(

What I need is a polite "Lovely party, but I really can't stay her anymore" kind of canned line. Anyone got one?

I would would prefer not having to explain to an acquaintance that I have this 'handicap' or social 'disability' that overwhelms me in certain situations.

Much obliged,

Emma

posted in HSPs - 13 replies

What the..........?

Keith — Sun, 21 Mar 2004 15:03:38 GMT

Check out the Google ads I'm seeing on the home page of this tribe:

----------------------------------------------------------------

Depression Treatment
Counselors Always Here to Help. National Hotline . . .

SF & Marin Psychologist
Individuals, couples. Modest fees. Solution-focused with depth.

Help for Depression
Natural remedy proven to relieve depression. Safe and affordable.

SF Bay Area Psychotherapy
Psychologist offers help for panic, depression, anxiety, relationships

----------------------------------------------------------------

That's just what we need to reinforce that there's nothing wrong with us! Grrrrrrrrrrrrr!

This happens on another tribe I belong to ( http://childfreebychoice.tribe.net ), by the way... A group where people celebrate their vasectomies and yet get advertising for vasectomy reversals!

Grrrrrrrrrrrrr

posted in HSPs - 4 replies

HSP & Fibromyalgia

Euphoria — Tue, 20 Jan 2004 20:57:37 GMT

Anyone here have fibromyalgia? I was diagnosed with it about ten years ago and many of the symptoms seem to be the same as HSP. I would even venture to guess that everyone who has fibromyalgia also is an HSP.

posted in HSPs - 7 replies

One day a week w/no social contact?

Jen — Tue, 23 Mar 2004 03:11:50 GMT

Recently, I happened to come across an old e-mail from an HSP related site that contained someone's essay on how she protects and honors her sensitivity. It closed with a short of bullet point list of items she felt other HSPs would benefit from. One of those items was "one day each week with no social contact." I have to admit I wasn't sure how easily accomplished this would be for the average HSP. Does anyone here practice this? How do you feel about this practice?

posted in HSPs - 2 replies

Artwork someone added to photo album

Jen — Tue, 23 Mar 2004 03:06:12 GMT

Take two...my first attempt at posting this resulted in an error - argh!

I happened to notice this evening that there has been an addition the tribe's photo album (image of a teary eyed girl holding up a fallen bird). I don't know who uploaded the picture, but I am inclined to agree that it does seem like the artwork of an HSP...

posted in HSPs - 0 replies

Food - how intense?

Jen — Wed, 25 Feb 2004 22:26:54 GMT

When it comes to eating, how do you feel about blandness versus spicy, sweet, bitter, or otherwise intense flavors? Do you prefer to eat the same thing pretty consistently or is variety extremely important?

posted in HSPs - 10 replies

What are your favorite things about the trait?

Jen — Tue, 25 Nov 2003 00:43:17 GMT

Since it was touched on a bit in the previous thread, I figured it would be fun to see what everyone considers their gifts as an HSP.

One of the biggest things for me (and something those who know me also strongly identify me with) is my love and connection to animals. I especially love cats and have befriended many a terribly shy kitty! Thankfully, I don't have to use this skill very often, but there's been a few times now when I've noticed that a pet was unwell.

posted in HSPs - 11 replies

movies

Emmazon — Fri, 13 Feb 2004 02:40:33 GMT

Hello all...

I'm wondering if any of you share my love for high-quality, beautiful movies with lots of great dialogue...films I have been known to call "All plot, no action."

I love renting films, but I *really* like to steer clear of upsetting material. I know that violence, rape, and abuse take place in the world. They are rampant in the urban area I live in. But I don't have to pay to see it in a movie.

Here are my feel-good favorites:

Il Postino
Amelie
Room with a View
My Dinner with Andre
Waking Life
Innocence
All Jane Austen (Emma, Pride & Prejudice, Sense & Sensibility, Persuasion)
Uncorked (Nigel Hawthorne)

Can anyone help me with my next trip to the video store?

Much obliged,

Emma

posted in HSPs - 15 replies

Share your HSP Self Test Results

Keith — Mon, 24 Nov 2003 06:00:10 GMT

Assuming you have indeed taken the Highly Sensitive Person Self Test at http://hsperson.com/pages/test.htm (because if you didn't, you wouldn't be here, right?), share your score, and what (if anything) you learned about yourself taking the self test.

I just barely went over the threshold and I discovered that I'm the rare breed of HSP who is actually extraverted.

posted in HSPs - 32 replies

adaptation

Chris — Thu, 19 Feb 2004 21:08:53 GMT

I'm reading a great book called The Paradox of Choice: Why More is Less, by Barry Schwartz. It's about how and why the plethora of options available to us can reduce our level of satisfaction rather than increasing it. I'll try to post more general commentary later, but right now I'm thinking especially about his chapter on adaptation. When someone encounters a new experience, at first it seems very pleasant, or unpleasant, or hot, or cold, or whatever. Over time, they get more accustomed to it and notice it less. In another book I read recently (Too Loud, Too Bright, Too Fast, Too Tight, by Heller) the author says sensory defensives (a concept close to HSPs) *don't* adapt to unpleasant experiences as easily as most people. So, for example, if the average person puts on a slightly scratchy sweater, they feel it at first but within five or ten minutes they edit it out. A sensory defensive might never be able to screen it out, and will get more and more bothered until they rip the darn thing off in frustration.

This seems to me to connect to some of the other threads we've been having. Like the one on favorite things about the trait, that Jennifer started, and also the one on repetition. Folks talk about how much they appreciate beautiful or moving things. Maybe, just was we never adjust to that scratchy sweater, we never lose our awe at a work of art or thing of beauty. I work next to the zoo, and I go there on my lunch hour most days to watch the lemurs. Always the lemurs. I told a friend I was doing that, and he said "what, again?" -- but I never get bored with them. Maybe part of why I don't seek out new experiences isn't just being timid about them; maybe it's that I can keep on loving the things I'm used to without the pleasures fading over time.

Anything here ring any bells for folks?

-- Chris

posted in HSPs - 0 replies

r

Tue, 10 Feb 2004 18:20:09 GMT

I hate being super sensitive...

posted in HSPs - 4 replies

Famous HSPs

Jen — Wed, 11 Feb 2004 04:05:23 GMT

Maybe you've read something about a celebrity or historical figure or heard something they said in an interview that resonated with you. Dr. Aron regularly uses the example of Abraham Lincon. Who do you think is an HSP?

Here's a partial list of my own contenders:
Fred Rogers, AKA "Mr. Rogers" (late children's TV show host)
Tim Burton (filmmaker)
Alanis Morissette (musician)
John Myung (musician - Dream Theater)
Kevin Moore (musician - formerly of Dream Theater)
Brian Wilson (musician - Beach Boys)
Steve Martin (actor and author)

posted in HSPs - 1 reply

repetition

Chris — Tue, 06 Jan 2004 05:20:24 GMT

Does anyone else here find repetition really soothing? I listen to the same books on tape over and over; it's much more comfortable background noise for me that just everyday noise. I re-read books, too. Anybody else?

-- Chris

posted in HSPs - 6 replies

The Assertive Introvert

Jen — Mon, 02 Feb 2004 21:51:57 GMT

You gotta like a site whose slogan is "We're here, we're quiet - now quit hassling us!" ;) It's not a very big site, but it has some tongue in cheek humor for introverts and a links page.

The Assertive Introvert
http://users.erols.com/beachkitty/index.html

posted in HSPs - 0 replies

If you think of yourself of "shy"

Jen — Sat, 31 Jan 2004 00:17:18 GMT

Here's a really great web site that emphasizes the *gifts* of shyness:
http://www.shyandfree.com

posted in HSPs - 0 replies

Other books of interest to HSPs

Jen — Sat, 24 Jan 2004 00:40:37 GMT

What other books have you read that you felt touched upon HSP experience, but were not specifically marketed toward HSPs? I know that Chris has mentioned the _Too Fast..._ book a couple times now. One of these days, I want to read _The Introvert Advantage_.

posted in HSPs - 4 replies

Movies for/about HSPs

Jen — Mon, 29 Dec 2003 06:22:41 GMT

Tonight I was watching "Edward Scissorhands" again for the first time in a long time. The first time I saw it was before I knew I was an HSP. At a time after gaining this knowledge, I did see an interesting AMC "Backstory" about the film. That documentary made me think that Tim Burton and Johnny Depp may be fellow HSPs and that Edward certainly is a beautifully sensitive character. In viewing the film again, the character of Edward really resonated with me.

I have mentioned "Edward Scissorhands," but that's certainly not the extent of films that I've thought of as being for/about HSPs. What films have you seen that appear to have HSP or HSP-like characters? How about films that just seemed thematically appealing to a sensitive nature?

posted in HSPs - 3 replies

Just saying hi

denmarkguy — Thu, 15 Jan 2004 03:32:06 GMT

I guess I've just started to post a bunch of replies-- without any kind of introduction, so here goes:

I was born and grew up in Denmark, but currently live in Austin Texas. I'm 43, and have known about being an HSP since I read Elaine's book shortly after it was published. I was somewhat familiar with "sensitivity" as a personality trait *before* that, as a result of studying adult giftedness for several years-- "HSP" is very similar to Dabrowski's "Hypersensitivities," found in gifted individuals.

What else? I'm an introvert; an INFJ according to the Myers-Briggs personality types. I used to work in the very UN-HSP fields of sales and marketing, until I "re-invented" myself a few years ago, and now work as a self-employed technical writer-- which is really just a stepping stone towards (hopefully) a full-time life as a creative writer of some kind.

I'm pretty "at peace" with being an HSP, without using it as some kind of "label to hide behind." I think the trait gives us gifts and possibilities in certain areas of life, but also certain challenges in other parts that most people consider "routine."

--Peter

posted in HSPs - 2 replies

interesting quiz

honey_b_licious — Thu, 08 Jan 2004 21:10:10 GMT

I couldn't find a direct link to this quiz, but here it is on the UK Guardian's site. I'm interested in how other HSP's score.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/life/flash/page/0,13249,937836,00.html

posted in HSPs - 5 replies

Holidaze?

Keith — Fri, 28 Nov 2003 16:13:40 GMT

How do y'all do durng the holidays? I'm listening to radio reports of how packed the malls are this morning, historically the biggest shopping day of the year. Do y'all participate in that shopfest? Or are you more likely to shop online or time your shopping experiences during less hectic days?

Several years ago, my wife and I once tried to visit an area mall during the holiday shopping season. We entered the parking lot and proceeded to a faraway place for a parking space -- opting not to attempt to fish for a reasonably close spot. After fifteen minutes of stop-and-go (mostly stop) driving, we decided to give up... And then it took us another 45 minutes to exit the parking lot! It was absolute gridlock. Since then, we resolved never to go to that mall (or the stores/restaurants adjacent to it) between Thanksgiving and New Year's Day.

posted in HSPs - 12 replies

Subcultures

Jen — Sun, 21 Dec 2003 19:57:30 GMT

Following list is from http://www.lifeworkshelp.com/hspsubculture.htm

Jacquelyn Strickland is an HSP, counselor, and life coach with a specific interest in high sensitivity. Along with Dr. Elaine Aron, she has coordinated the now annual HSP Gatherings (http://www.lifeworkshelp.com/hspgathering.htm).

HSP Subcultures:

"The Social Justice/Activist HSP
Deeply moved to action by injustices whether upon people or the environment. Usually dedicated to many causes to improve human and earthly conditions…view new paradigms for a new world.

HSP Physical Reactor
HSPs who are unusually physically reactive to certain foods, noise, lights, stress. Physical reactions may include allergies, sweaty palms, nervousness, nausea, migraine headaches.

Reserved Intellectual HSP
Usually introverts with keen intellect. May appear arrogant, but may not necessarily be that way.

Creative/Artistic HSP
Those HSPs who need to create and manifest their ideas or visions. Medium may be music, drama, art, ideas, books, poetry, painting, etc.

The HSP Healer
Medical doctors and alternative healers who are unusually intuitive using their gifts to offer healing to others. Alternative healing modalities may be Reiki, massage, medical intuitive, etc.

Empowered Priestly Advisor
Evidenced by energetic, purposeful and spiritual direction in their lives.

The HSP in Transition
The person who has just discovered the trait of high sensitivity. May feel alone, misunderstood, judged, and may also feel relief at knowing about the trait.

The Core Issue HSP
The HSP from a traumatic, troubled and sometimes abandoned childhood. May have suffered from some type of abuse.

The Introverted Intellectual HSP
Somewhat different from the "Reserved Intellectual HSP" in that this HSP is drawn either to the scientific fields of inquiry (The Thinker) or to the psycho-spiritual fields of study (The Feeler) (or both?).

The Wise, Saintly HSP
The Mother Teresas of the world. Supreme devotion to serve a higher spiritual calling.

The Caregivers and Guardians of Childhood, the Elderly, and the Dying
Those who find caring for children, the elderly and the dying come naturally. They have a unique ability to serve those with special needs."

posted in HSPs - 10 replies

Hello/NYE trepidations

Chris — Tue, 30 Dec 2003 17:51:53 GMT

Hello all, I'm new to this online tribe but not new to the HSP idea -- I recognized myself in Aron's book when it first came out. I'm glad to have some understanding folks to share with.

Right now my concern is New Year's Eve. My preferred mode of celebration is to spend a quiet evening with a few friends talking about hopes and dreams for the year to come. My new sweetie's preferred mode is to party-hop, hitting two or three noisy, happening spots. Having this ritual is pretty important to him. Being with him on NYE is important to me, but I'm worried about getting overloaded. We talked about this for a while last night, and our plan is to start at a quiet gathering (friends of his who I know somewhat), then head to a bigger party thrown by some friends of his. That one's near where I live, so if we're happy enough to stay until midnight, I can kiss my honey as the clock strikes twelve and get home not too late. If he wants to hop on towards the next event, it gets stickier. I don't want to be physically miserable, but I also don't want to make him feel trapped. We communicate pretty well, so I'm mostly trusting that we'll somehow manage to meet both of our needs, but I'm also worried that this is a relationship test we may not be able to pass.

How do you all handle big celebrations? Have you had to negotiate differing stimulus needs with a partner?

-- Chris

posted in HSPs - 12 replies

News for the introverts

Jen — Tue, 06 Jan 2004 01:31:28 GMT

Since introverts are highly represented within the HSP population, I thought I would share this information I recently came across. While I do not really like the name of the article in came from ("Turn your flaws into fine points:," *Health* September 2003), I found it interesting to find out we actually are physically different from extroverts.

"Introverts
You know you're one if: YOu begin to wild long before the party ends.

Your challenge: If you're an introvert, interactions with others tend to zap your energy, whereas extroverts thrive on them, says Laney, a marriage and family therapist. Blame it on brain chemistry, which researchers have found differs between these personality types. When engaged in conversation, extroverts process information through short-term memor, a quick-access area of the brain that enables them to respond quickly. Introverts rely on long-term memory, a part of the brain with more complex pathways. Because of this extra work, you may feel drained as you search for the right word or simply think things through.

A study published in the *American Journal of Psychiatry* points out another disadvantage. PET scans have shown that introverts tend to have more activity in the parts of the brain linked to planning, remembering, and problem solving. Extroverts buzz more in the sensory regions, so while they feed off the sights and sounds of the outside world, introverts focus on their own thoughts. Others may find you unexpressive or even a tad unfriendly, when you're merely busy thinking.

Make it work for you: Introverts can be respected as intellects with a knack for creative ideas, and they shine when addressing topics they care about. Laney advises leaving witty repartee to the extroverts and concentrating on subjects that mean a lot ot you. Try to control the amount of stimulation around you. At parties, Laney recommends "staging," or starting at the edges of the gathering and working your way in. In everyday situations, take breaks when you can: Just five minutes alone in the bathroom at work can help you get your bearings."

posted in HSPs - 3 replies

HSPs and empaths site

Jen — Wed, 24 Dec 2003 20:56:29 GMT

I think this is a relatively new site:
Care & Feeding of Empaths and HSPs
http://womensu.com/Empaths-HSPs/index.htm

posted in HSPs - 0 replies

Making Work Work for Highly Sensitive People

Jen — Wed, 26 Nov 2003 01:48:03 GMT

A new book about HSPs will be out soon titled _Making Work Work for Highly Sensitive People_ by Barrie Jaeger:
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/007140810X/qid=1069810812/sr=1-1/ref=sr_1_1/002-0032430-7585667?v=glance&s=books

I think this will be a great addition to the already existing library of books about sensitive people.

posted in HSPs - 2 replies

Welcome!

Jen — Mon, 24 Nov 2003 05:09:27 GMT

To officially kick things off, I would like to send out a hello and welcome to my fellow HSPs. :)

posted in HSPs - 0 replies